I'm A Slut Like The Other Girls

Friday night I ended up in a DC speakeasy that doesn’t have an Instagram. It’s not on Google Maps. You can’t take photos in there. So when I say you have to know about this place, you really do have to know. More on that on IG soon…

I only found it because I’m a yapper. I was out with Imani (some of you may know her from Imani at Home) and bae, and we were chatting with our server like we do. Then he clued us in: did you know there’s a speakeasy behind this building?

We didn’t. But we do now.

We had a fabulous night. A few too many gin cocktails. And then, because this is what we do, we went to find late-night fried chicken.

While Imani was ordering, a man at a table looked her up and down and said: I really like your outfit. It’s dope. It’s not revealing like the other girls. Not slutty like them.

She turned and looked him dead in the eye.

“Nah, I’m a slut like the other girls. I’m her. They are me.”

She said it with a smile. Classic Imani delivery.

I’ve been thinking about that moment since. The way she refused to let herself be used as a weapon against other women, even when that man was trying to compliment her. The ease of it. The clarity. That’s the kind of community I want to be in. Those are the kinds of rooms I want to keep showing up in.

I’ve been in my selfish era this year - you know this - but the more honest version of that is that I’ve been learning how to show up in ways that mean something. Beyond performance. Truly authentic, like Imani.

One of the places I’ll be doing that this year is the Black Women in Food Summit.

If you don’t know Black Women in Food: they’ve built a summit, a marketplace, and an awards program that has moved careers - including mine, early on - and they’ve done it without the institutional backing you’d expect at their level.

Over 300,000 Black women were pushed out of the U.S. workforce between February and April 2025. In this economy, what they’re building is even more necessary.

The Black Women in Food Summit is April 23-25 in Washington, DC.

I’ll be there. I’m moderating a panel on leveraging media to shift narratives and teaching a workshop on authentic storytelling and content creation. I’ll be walking you through the exact framework I use to stay grounded and keep producing, especially in the hardest seasons.

There’s also a pitch competition, a marketplace with 30+ vendors, and a lot of Black women doing the thing.

I hope you’ll be there with me.

Who in your life is an Imani - someone who shows up for other women without thinking twice? Take a few minutes today and send her a note letting her know how much you see her.

As part of my self-care year, I’ve been trying to seriously dial in rest and recovery. To do that, I bought a Whoop strap. I wanted a fitness tracker that could track sleep but didn’t come with a screen. I have enough screens in my life.

I’ve been wearing mine for over a year now and the data has genuinely helped me understand and improve my sleep. Recently I upgraded to the newest version, and Whoop sent me a gifting kit to pass along my old one.

My old Whoop still works perfectly. The sensor has been fully cleaned. And now it has a brand new strap. It definitely needs a new home.

So, I’m opening up a giveaway to paid subscribers. All you have to do is comment below with one thing you’re working on this year. I’ll select a commenter at random and mail you the Whoop along with a few other goodies! Giveaway ends at Friday, April 3 and I’ll select a winner and notify then on April 4.

As hard as this year has been already, I am so grateful for the women in my life like Imani. The ones who show up unflinchingly and remind me, just by being themselves, exactly how important it is to be myself.